At some point in your Christian life, you have probably heard something to the effect of, “if you see someone walking in sin, you need to correct them.” Additionally, many of us strive to obey the words of Proverbs 27:17, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” So, when we see a brother or sister walking in ungodliness, we seek to sharpen them in hopes of them returning to the path of righteousness.
In this post, I want to take the time to walk through the necessary steps we need to take before we extend Biblical correction to a brother or sister. Hear me when I say this: if we do not take the necessary steps, precautions, or approaches, we will be doing more harm than good. More harm to the stumbling brother or sister, and more harm to ourselves.
Examine Yourself
The words of Jesus ring ever true in situations like desiring to extend biblical correction.
“Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.” – Matthew 7:3-5
There are a couple of truths that I want to examine from this. First, yes, we need to look at our own hearts and address our sinfulness before we approach someone else. Our words will fall flat if we do not look inwardly. If we see someone walking out of line from God’s commands, and our desire to speak to them, our first command from God is to not run over and correct them. Look again at what Jesus says. You are to address your sins and shortcomings first! You deal with yourself, then you have permission from the Lord to go and speak to the other person.
Secondly, you need to examine the words and phrases that you will be using as you speak to a wayward believer. Look at what Paul says to the Corinthians. “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal” – 1 Corinthians 13:1. If you go to someone who is sinning and yell at them, use harsh and offensive language, and/or are abrasive, you are sinning, and have just wasted your time.
Your words will never be received positively if there is no love attached to them. Paul essentially says you’ll only ever be “annoying” without love in your words and tone. So as you look to speak to someone who is sinning, let me ask you this: Are you seeking to truly help, or to just blow off steam and be rude? Do you actually care for this person, or are you just looking to correct someone for the sake of correction?
Lastly, your words must be personal and face-to-face. If we seek to help our stumbling brother or sister, we need to go to them in person and speak to them. Look at Jesus’s words in Matthew 18:15“If your brother sins against you, GO and tell him his fault, between you and him alone” (emphasis added). You cannot offer effective help and correction by texting, Facebook messaging, or anything else that is not face-to-face. I know it may be uncomfortable, but we have got to lovingly go to the individual in question, and speak to them.
As you walk the path of extending biblical correction to someone, you must stop, examine your heart, your motive, and your speech, otherwise all you have done is make matters worse. May we walk in loving kindness alongside all our brothers and sisters.
Examine the Stumbling Believer
Now, this is where I believe a lot of people run the risk of doing more harm than good. Let me ask you another series of questions: Do you personally know the individual that you are about to offer correction towards? Do you have a relationship with them, and/or the authority to speak to them? If your answer is “yes,” then I encourage you to lovingly speak to them! James tells us that, “whoever turns a sinner from the error of their way will save them from death and cover over a multitude of sins.” – James 5:20.
As you look to give biblical correction, extend grace and love to the individual. Speak lovingly, yet boldly with them! Know that Christ is with you!
However, if your answer is “no,” then you may need withhold your words towards that person. While, yes, all Christians should hold one another accountable, but if you are looking from afar with religious binoculars onto someone else’s life, there may be a lot going on that you are unaware of.
Maybe that stumbling individual you see is already being counseled and discipled through their issues. Maybe this is a momentary “backsliding” and this person is already taking necessary steps to fix it. Ultimately, we may not have all the details together. Now, I am not saying to be silent and never bring it up. Rather, let’s look at a way in which we ought to address sin we see in a stranger, or someone of whom we have little to no relationship with.
An Example
If we examine a person, and we come to the conclusion that perhaps we aren’t the best person to address the issue, we need to go to someone else. In situations like this, I recommend going to the church elders and/or pastors. Without gossiping, you can ask if the person in question is currently being discipled by another church member, or just simply bring the issue before them, and allow the leadership to take the next steps from there. Because more often than not, the leadership has already seen, or knows, what is going on and it already handling it.
This is why trust in your church leadership is crucial. Because as church elders and pastors, they have been given authority to address and call out all members of the church. You may not necessarily have that same level of authority. So, examine your circle of influence. Are you in a Community Group, Wednesday or Sunday School class, or on a ministry team with this backsliding Christian? Are you doing life with this person, or are you looking from afar, ready to pounce on someone who you barely even know?
Conclusion
We all desire to see our fellow brothers and sisters walk in righteousness and grow in sanctification. Therefore, we should not be silent or passive when it comes to sin. However, we should also be “wise as serpents” when determining if we are the best person for the job. Again, I want to reiterate. I am not saying be silent and ignore someone’s sin because you don’t know them. Rather, go find the church leaders, the Community Group leaders, or someone who may already have a close relationship with them.
And if you are that person who has a close relationship with them, know that as you lovingly approach this individual, the Holy Spirit goes before you, and stands alongside you. Be bold and gentle!
May the God of wisdom, discernment, and peace guide us in these times, and may we move boldly and gently to restore a love our wayward brothers and sisters. Amen.
North Bullitt Christian Church 