Yes and No

But above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or by any other oath, but let your “yes” be yes and your “no” be no, so that you may not fall under condemnation. – James 5:12

Growing up, my parents taught me many lessons on how to be a respectful person. 

• Say “yes ma’am” and “yes sir”
• Always say “thank you”
• Avoid being late to events/committments
• Be courteous to other people

There were obviously more than just those, but you get the idea. However, there is one lesson that my dad instilled in me at a young age that I still hold fast to. It was to mean what I say, and say what I mean. In the words of James, “let your yes be yes, and your no be no.” As a man too, he would add this phrase, “as a man, you are only as good as your word.”

I think James would agree with my dad and his advice.

We live in a time where people lie constantly, and are even encouraged to do so! According to our culture that preaches a selfish and self-serving lifestyle, if you’ve committed to something you don’t have to follow through with it. Your word can change, and you can just say something as a formality and a polite answer, rather than being honest. You have to look out for yourself, after all.  

But that should not be so for the Christian! We are to be a people who are honest, and back up what we say and commit to with our actions.

Do Not Take an Oath

As Christians, as representatives of Christ and His Kingdom, we should be honest and trustworthy just as He is. During the time of the early church, and even in Jesus’s day shortly prior, the Jews had developed a bad habit of not keeping their word to others. So, in a way to “trust” the words they would be saying, they would make oaths and swear by something. It might look like this in our time: “I swear on my mother’s grave that I will be there to pick you up from the airport on Tuesday.”

But here is the thing. Breaking an oath under the Levitical law is a sin. If you make a vow or swear by an oath, you must hold to it. That’s why you see warnings of making rash and hasty vows! 

Going back to our airport example, if I simply said “yes I will pick you up from the airport on Tuesday,” but was later unable to do so, I can communicate that to someone and I’m not at fault, I haven’t broken any oath. But, should I make a vow and say “I swear  (or make an oath) that I will be there to pick you up from the airport on Tuesday,” and I can’t for whatever reason later on, I have violated God’s law and sinned! I have broken my vow and that is a very serious thing, especially back in the time of the early church. 

So on one hand there is the obvious, “just be honest and commit to your word” application, but we see in James, and even in Jesus from the Gospels when he says “But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one” (Matthew 5:34-37), that there is a protecting of ourselves at work here. Don’t make a vow if you think you might not be able to keep it! Because to make a vow and not keep it is dangerous!

So, the solution? Just don’t take an oath. Just simply say what you mean, and mean what you say. You say you will do something, and that is good enough. 

Be a People of Honesty

This all ties back to the application of being honest with one another. My prayer is that when someone asks for my help, and I commit, that they know I’ll follow through. I want to be like Jesus in that when I speak, I do. Jesus’s speaking was His doing, and may that apply to His followers as well. 

Lying is a sin, we know that. But the other form of dishonesty that we don’t think of is the sin of not keeping our words. It is that serious! This is a call for us all to be men and women of our word. To follow through. To act like Jesus, who lived a life of perfect honesty. Who said a lot of things, and yet always backed them up with His actions. 

I look at my relationship with God, and I am so thankful that His yes and no is absolute. It brings me comfort, and it should for you as well. Think about it. God accepts us into His family, and He has declared us righteous and guiltless before Him. At no time ever will God change His mind and say “Actually, I thought about it, and you’re out of the family now. Goodbye.”

I can go to sleep each night, and be on mission for Him every day with rest and peace in my soul because I know that God’s yes over me is eternal. 

In that same vein, I too want to live with sincere honesty towards others. I want there to be no uncertainty in someone’s mind when I agree to help, or say something to them. I can look at God’s eternal honesty towards me, and use that to motivate my speech. I no longer should feel the need to “back up my words” by swearing on something. Rather, I can let my word mean something to the world around me. 

And the same goes for you too. May the Church be a people of honesty, and a people who are committed to keeping their words.

Let your “yes” and “no” be genuine and true.